Reflecting.

Its that time of the year again. The last day of the year, the time we all sit and reflect and make resolutions for the coming year, in hope that the next year will be better that the year before.

We live, we learn. Another year gone by, another lifes lesson learnt.

I don't know how many resolutions I will make this year. I think I'll keep them minimal, and at best doable.

Its been a whirlwind year for me. I've done things I'd never imagine I would and/or could do. I've gone places I never imagined I would see. I lived, I laughed, I cried.

I got depressed, I got drunk, I got high.

I took some gambles, some paid off. Some, I learnt to live with. Others, I'm still trying to learn from. I packed up my bags and flew half way around the world and left everything I ever knew behind - A difficult decision to make, but nevertheless one I have never regretted taking.

I found friends I never thought I would find and kept those who mattered close to my heart. I learnt to depend less on others, and to take baby steps to do things for just for me. I learnt to stop saying sorry for mistakes that weren't mine and to not let people push me around (okay, at least not so much).

I learnt to have a little more patience, to be a little less competitive, to be a little more thankful.

Thank you for your faith in me. Thank you for your support. Thank you for your friendship. Thank you for your love. I could have never made it this far by myself.

This year, I'm keeping things simple. Im want to ..

- Appreciate what I have and remember to let it show
- Have faith that everything will work out somehow
- Have the strength to keep my chin up even in the face of adversities
- Let go a little and stop comparing
- To do, and not just try
- Have patience to wait for my turn to shine
- Eat less chocolate (haha)
- Get back into shape (this one comes up every year)
- Be happy, make others happy
- Worry a little less over things out of my control
- Grow a little more (Dont know how to do this one yet)
- Adopt a turtle (finally!)
- Make a difference (Have I made a difference in your life?)

Have wings, will fly.

I sit here quietly and wait for the breaking of a new year and wonder what will come this time around. I will make something out of it. I promise.

Compartmentalizing

Bad news from home (okay, well bad for me) in the middle of my shift.

Umm.. yeah. Well.

Shove it aside and get on with the day. Thats all I can do, no ?

That and eat a whole lot of chocolate.

Go back to my room and drown my sorrows in a hot hot shower.

Why is it that things crumble when Im not there to watch them ?

Make a bookmark.

Its my one month anniversary today.

One month on the rig. Big achievement for me, I'm proud of myself.

Growing and learning in small little baby steps, doing things I never though I would do.

Still so far to go before Im ready to fly solo.

But its a comfort to know Im not alone.

Banana Pancakes.

With ice cream or honey of nutella.

Thats what I want.
Thankfully, I'm removed from temptation. Its day 23 on the rig - no pancakes (unless I want to wake up at 6am) and no nutella.

Noone to feed me.

I suppose its a good thing. Still trying to shed the excess baggage from Paris. Apparently Im not doing a very good job though. Damn, this is like Australia all over again, only thing is that Im stuck on a rig so I cant exactly work out. I hate being chubby.

I was contemplating running up and down the stairs just to get a little bit of a work out but I think that constitutes as a saftety hazard. And its freaking cold outside which means I need to eat.

Arggh. I will grit my teeth and step on a scale later today. Hopefully I wont obsess about the number but Im pretty sure I will.

Damn, I just realised that all Ive been babbling about so far is being chubby. I have to stop obsessing.

Easier said than done, but whatever lah.

Anyway..... day 23 on the rig. I feel so gross, I have no tweezers so I cant groom my eyebrows. Oversharing, I know. Other than that, Im fine. Being the 1 out of 2 females out of the 100 or so people on this rig doenst bother me all that much. Having to share a toilet with 6 people is another story all together.

Not that its dirty but still ... its freakin annoying to have to go all the way up, change out og my boots and helmet and glasses and take off my jacket and BA set ...... go into the living quarters to my room desperatuly needing to pee ... and someones in the toilet.

Or you reach over to wipe your ass .... and .. no toilet paper -_-"

Ahhh well ... no complaints.
Damn, need to go to the toilet now. Toodles.

A lesson learnt

This stumbled across this note today. At just the right time, I suppose; I was starting to bitch about things. I'm putting it here as a small reminder to myself.

Gratitude

Be grateful to those who have hurt or harmed you,
for they have reinforced your determination

Be grateful to those who have deceived you,
for they have deepened your insight

Be grateful to those who have hit you,
for they have reduced your karmic obstacles

Be grateful to those who have abandoned you,
for they have taught you to be independent

Be grateful to those who have made you stumble,
for they have strengthened your ability

Be grateful to those who have denounced you,
for they have increased your wisdom and concentration.

Its hard to be grateful when you still feel sore; its easier to bitch, maybe it even feels better to bitch. Its hard to stand next to someone perfect.

Im trying to take comfort in the fact that what doesnt kill you makes you stronger.

.....

Still trying.

Grey Matter

Self titled. I am confused.

I generally live in randomness, just following the wind. I dont't like to think too much about how or when or why. Because this is what happens when I do - I get confused.

Within and without, I don't know what to do nor what I want. What I could want, what I should want, what I do want. What I have, what I haven't. Should have, could have.

It gets confusing. Too many things for my small little head. The more things swirl around the more fuzzy it gets - its harder and harder to grasp onto something concrete. I did math and physics because numbers and formulas make sense. I can daydream but I dont do abstract.

Am I being selfish? Am I making the right decisions, choosing the right path?
Do I get scared for the right reasons or am I just scared for the wrong ones.

Ahhh dammit. I need a Dr Phil.

Day by Day

Dammit. I had a post and it dissapeared. Again.

Hmm.
[ internal sensor, one paragraph deleted ]

I'm still here, on the rig. I'm glad I like the sea. Up on the deck, good weather, watching the sunset... Watching the seagulls spread their wings and just glide on the air currents. Man, I wish I could do that.

Just fly and be free. To go wherever ... whenever ... effortlessly. And to drop back into the water to float around.

Just follow the wind. Go where it takes you.

Am I starting to sound like a complete nutter yet?
I always wanted to fly. I tried the Alice in Wonderland way, the Mary Poppins way, the Peter Pan way. All failed me.

I was told that my wings are there, right behind me. . . And that I was meant to reach the skies.

Thank you for your faith in me.

Oh, I'm trying to figure out what animal I'd be if I was one. Any ideas?

Crawling

Twelve to twelve. Day shift. I am thankful its not night.

Tired.

Still on standby, meaning we just pretty much keep an eye on things at the moment. Run out for a bit when we need to. Otherwise, just sit in the cabin and keep out of the way.

Anyway, the seasoned people here came prepared - books and movies.

I have one miserable book I dragged from home all the way to Doha, to Paris, back to Doha and now to the rig. I think I've memorised it by now.

No movies, dont have enough space in my HD to put them in (damn i need a new one). Same goes for music. I only have whats in my sad sad 4Gb Ipod (damn, need to get a bigger one).

All I have is my measly Sudoku book.

Man, Im sleepy. Just a momentary break to do something useless before I fall asleep. Waiting for midnight, handover shift, grab a snack, take a hot shower and jump into bed.

Roughly one and a half more hours to go. Time always crawls when you need it to fly.

Naked.

I feel naked.

Yeah.

For the first time since I can remember Im not wearing any jewellery. At all.

No earrings. No necklace.

So bare !

Im on the rig. So far so good... its giving me a bit of a heacache though. Me and Farah are the only two girls in this whole place.

Cross fingers, hope this job will be a good one for me.

Have wings, will fly.

Thank you.

Jump

Hmmmm.
Its been a quiet day. As usual. I'm rambling in my head, but i cant put anything down on paper.

Or on the screen, if i want to be more precise. But who cares anyway.

Hmmm.....

Yeah ..

Haha. I just completed a sentance in my head.

Im heading off to the rig tomorrow. I wonder whats in store for me. I cant say I'm not apprehensive, it being my first time and all ... but yeah .. up for the challenge, its time to step up and fly. Can I do it ?

Only one way to find out. Take a deep breathe and jump :)
Even if you're falling .... you still fly, if only for a while.

Just a little bit more focused and it would have been perfect

Sometimes, the rush you get from jumping is worth facing the fear.

All at once

Its been a while.
More than two weeks, I would imagine. Not that I'm keeping count. But yeah .. its been a while.

So much has changed in so short a time. I've left Europe behind me, left behind two and a halfs months of dreaming and dropped back in reality to Doha with a hard, hard thud. Ouch.

Fly high, fall hard, but better than not flying at all, right?

Anyone wants to tell me my photography skills have improved?

We all have to get back to work some day. Nothing much to say at the moment .. Gathering my pics (which happen to be on the other lappie right now - sorry Terri, I know I still owe you one) to post of a little photojournal of my time there.

Words can't describe it. And I'm too lazy to write in detail, so pictures will have to suffice.

Oh well.. Back in Doha and unmotivated (same phone number, call me!!). Trying to pull together the nerve to step back into my boots and coveralls and back to the base. Its hard, having to start over; with noone to watch my back.

I will miss the other trainees dearly. And a little envious if truth be told that they got to end up in the same location together. But I will not whinge. I will count my blessings instead. I will not even say I will try not to whinge.

Someone told me that saying try is a sign of weakness.

I will keep my chin up. No fear. Time to fly solo. I don't think I'm ready but I have to jump anyway.

" All at once,
The world can overwhelm me
There's almost nothin' that you could tell me
That could ease my mind

Which way will you run
When it's always all around you
And the feelin' lost and found you again
A feelin' that we have no control
Around the sun
Some say
There's gonna be the new hell
Some say
It's still too early to tell
Some say

It really ain't no myth at all "

Jack Johnson

Empty

Its a rainy rainy Wednesday morning.

Im sitting here in semi darkness and im sleepy !

Or hungry. Maybe both. Its cold today.

I have recently rediscovered Michael Jackson (bored surfing youtube) and damn ! I just realised how wickedly awesome he is/was (?).

Whatever. Its a rainy Wednesday morning, Im sitting here cold in semi darkness and its depressing.

I need to get started on my packing soon. I hate packing. Makes everything seem so final. Time to pack up, uproot and transplant. To move on, go somewhere new. This nomadic life is hard to adjust to. As soon as you start getting comfortable its time to move on, yet again. Not a life to settle, to collect personal possesions and momentos. And I'm such a nester. Its hard.

Bah. Ignore me. Blame it on the rain.

Im hungry.

I was gonna post up pics since I havent updated for a while ... But I just realised that I cant do it from here; the network wont let me. Oh well.

Ummm .. Barack Obama won the election. I guess this year is indeed a time for change.

I wonder what other changes are to come. Two more months till the end 2008. Plenty of time for things to happen.

I miss you all.

Almost There

Just a little longer and i'll be a fully certified well test engineer.

Haha. Certified wor.

Then its time to move on. Feels strange, feels more than strange. Feels really strange.

Ah, whatever. Finished my TDA intensive today, just gotta complete my report (going to take me like forever, DAMN) and then I'm free. Well test interpretation, one more quiz and a project.

I've made it this far, through all the little mishaps (dammit, lappie is still in ITSupport) and I'm proud of how far I've come. Granted, I could have probably done better had I decided to stay in and study all the time, but I think i struck a good balance between fun and work. Or maybe not so much balance (more fun than work) but its works for me. Different priorities, So all is good.

I will miss this. I will miss you all.

We have 1.825kgs of Nutella.. If it doesnt finish by the time I have to leave Im taking it with me.

Review, Rewind

I just realised that my blogspot dates all the way back to 2004.

Damn, I didnt realise how much I had to say . . . or how much time has passed since then.
Blink blink. Another year has gone.

Reading back on a few random posts, so many things that happened and i forgot about.
Brings back old memories. Some that I'd rather not think about. So much happened, so much changed.

Do I miss it? I dont know.

No regrets, whatever it is. Keep pushing on.

I'm going to be uprooted again in 2 weeks time. Not looking forward to it. Its so hard to keep on moving. . . . Its so hard to look forward and not forget reality back home at the same time. So many responsibilities that I wish I didnt have to think about.

My next intensive is in a weeks time. Im not prepared. I dont feel prepared.
When I compare myself to others I always feel like im lacking. Like I'm lagging behind and that I should be doing better.

Why the feelings of inadequecy? I dont know; I wish I did . . It really sucks, to always feel like you need to be better. . .

Maybe I can blame my growing up for everything, har har

I missed a couple of birthdays this month, IM SORRY!!!!

I'll make it up to you girls, okay ?

Dreaming

Its Sunday night.

Just finished dinner - seafood nite ! (pan fried salmon, deep fried calamari, fresh tomatoes and stir fried veggies) and desert (banana toffee pie- okay, this was bought and not made) and I'm sitting here in my living/dining room at my lappie, hesitant to continue working on my report.

I've been here over 40 days already. I know because I set my camera to holiday mode the day I arrived.

I'll be here for a little over 3 weeks more. And I'm going to miss it so much.

I like my routine, I have come to value and enjoy so much the company of the people around me. People like me who have been plucked out of their comfort zones, away from everything familiar and sent here with me. To be my classmates.

I enjoy my after school snack with my housemate - usually Tuc while we are cooking dinner .. walking to the bus in the freezing cold ... taking walks down to the duckpond, going for Sunday morning runs... having dinner together .. Walking to the shopping centre, bitching about the fact that we have to walk to the shopping centre. . . . So many small things, so many things I will miss.

It feels more like a family here then it does back home, as strange as it seems.

Two completely different worlds. And every now and then an email from home kinda jolts you back to reality.

I wish I could keep dreaming, I dont want to wake up.

This is Crap

I've lost the last couple of my blog entries that I painstakingly wrote while I was here at ELC.

The stolen minutes where i penned (or typed) a few sentances during the little coffee breaks I have. All the time wasted for the freakin photos to upload. And then when I click save as draft, my draft dissappears.

Crap.

Anyhoow.. . too lazy to repost all those random thoughts. Put it in a bubble and let it blow away. Bah.

Busy busy for the past few days.

Todays work down the drain:

I hate being dependent on a electronic equipment.

I want to eat a cinnamon roll

I just read the papers. Or sort of read the papers (theStar online mah!)

Someone was killed today. Stabbed to death just for a handbag. In the sleepy, stinky little town i spent 4 years in at USM. Thirty minutes away across the bridge from my home.

Its just a small town, more village like than a city. Its quiet, shops close early and theres no entertainement. I thought crime only happens in big cities, i guess i was wrong.

Now Penang's CM is urging the Federal Government to speed up the installations of CCTV in Penang. Speed up wor. I think they've been trying to install em for at least a year . . .

Welcome to Malaysia.

Why is it that something has to happen first before action is taken? The bus crashes, the mat rempit cases, the snatch theft, break ins, rape cases, abuse cases . . .

Only when a major catastrophe occurs and it ends up in the papers does big shot up there decide to step in, offer condolence and come up with some kind of ops but always tak jadi.

Cis.

Bah. Whatever. Todays pretty picture:

Along the Seine, walking towards Notre Dame on Saturday night.

Week 3

Crap. I just lost one whole page.

Now im too lazy to repost the pics. SOrry !

Got a call from Yu Ming today (thanks ! ! ) Really, really miss you girls !

She said i sound sad. Do I sound sad? Am I sad? I dont know .. Its been a busy busy few weeks, and not know when i get to go home is kind of hard to deal with . . cos theres no specific date I can look forward to.

BUT despite that Im gradually losing my voice and its freakin cold, I think Im doing okay

Missing.

Have you seen my dog?

I lost him somewhere between transit of hotels. I cant find him anywhere and the hotel doesnt have him.

I am so upset.

Rex has been my buddy and constant companion for the past 20+ years. Ever since I before I can remember, and I cant find him. I know its dumb to be so attached to a ratty stuffed animal but I cant help it. Im a nester, I nest. I put down roots, and he was my anchor. And now I cant find him its all crumbling apart, Im starting to miss everything.

Dont tell me its time to grow up or to just buy something new; it doesnt work like that. And if you know me well enough you'd KNOW how much that stinky dog means to me.

Call me childish, I dont care. I lost my comfort item. I lost my anchor, I lost my constant. A stuffed animal has been keeping me sane through my journies across Malaysia, Europe, Doha, Sydney, Thailand . . I am so weak.

What do I hold on to now?

Psycho

Its all quiet here in the classroom

We've got a break, and all is silent except for the tap tap tapping of fingers flying across the keyboard. Everyone is either on MSN, YM or something else.

So quiet! It unnerves me. Im not used to it. Even my old Motorola office was never this quiet. Or the sound of typing was just never this obvious.

Oh man, i hate having nothing to do.

The idleness stresses me out.

I checked the weather today, its 10degrees this morning! Freezing! I really wish I had bought those boots at Zara in Doha.

Todays pic:

Notre Dame church at night.

I need to go in and ask for blessings.

Grrr

I am annoyed.

I am actually very annoyed.

I've got a withdrawal and expenditure limit set on my Maybank account. And I'm stuck here spending in Euros and Riyals and I cant get money out of my account cos I've gone over my 1k limit.

Crap.

I've been trying to get Maybank to increase my account limit but they wont. Cos in order to increase my limit i have to personally go to a Maybank ATM branch in MALAYSIA.

How the hell am I going to do that?

I couldnt change my cash into Euros before coming ( i came with only 145 Euros in my pocket) and I cant take out any extra cash. I should have just gone for HSBC.

Anyway, a couple of pics from France:

Too lazy too upload and resize anymore, i'll do it another time :)

I cant speak French

Its been a while. . .

Im trying to keep to updating this at least once a week. So many things to say, but not so much I want to share. Hmmm..

Call me if you want to know :)

Anyway, I had a jammed packed weekend (weekend being Thursday-Friday in Doha) before packing and jumping onto a flight and here I am in France!

Details of the weekend may or may not be posted just cos im lazy, but I had a good time

Its my 2nd day here now, I love it! Its fresh and green and cold but not to the point where im freezing yet. Good change from hot and dusty Qatar. It was 46degrees the afternoon i left.

Food is good (so far) but expensive (sadly) mainly cos of the shitty exchange rate we get. Havent gone out much except to the shopping area around Val d'Europe (is this how you spell it?) cos well . . . Im here for work/study.. so i hop on the bus in the morning at 7 . . . it takes an hour to get to the elc .. then we leave at 6 so im back at the hotel at 7. Twelve full hours!

Im hoping to get out a little more today.

Anyway, yesterday we went grocery shopping. . . And then I realised how freaking hard it is to be in a country where ALL the signs and ALL the labels are in a foreign language. I couldnt find the milk or the yoghurt or the biscuits. . had to randomly wander around all the aisles.

Im really glad im not here alone. Pics coming soon!

Jam.

I am, once again freakin cashless.

Damn.

My meal allowance isnt here yet. And i forgot i was out of cash ... haven't been out to the city centre for the past two days and i didnt go tonight so i cant get to an ATM.

Currently cashless and hungry. Damn. I could scab a loan but i dont really want to. Kate will cook rice for me, but i dont feel like it. And im too lazy to get up and go out now that i've taken a shower and im dressed in my jammies. The boys are ordering pizza (again!) but i dont feel like it and it will take like an hour to reach here anyway. I dont know what it want. . .

Why la?

Yoghurt for dinner, anyone?

Toaster Waffles

Okay.. Well . ..

I went home for 3-4 days of non stop activity (obvious from the lack of updates and puffy eyes), drove down to KL on Sunday, got my stuff done and hopped onto an all night flight.

And now im in Doha, Qatar. Again.

Sitting in my new room (moved to 2819!) where the AC is much much colder (freaking freezing), the window is bigger (nice and bright) but im missing my fridge and wastepaper basket.

I have got to look into that.

I had to sneak down to my old room and steal all my food. So now im sitting here, eating toaster waffles (which by the way are pretty good) waiting for time to pass till its 8.55AM and i head down to catch the bus to get to the base.

I am SO tired, i just arrived this morning. But what to do . . the price to pay for going home. It was worth it :)

People miss me. Its nice to be missed.

Missing all of you! If you're reading this then you know im safe and alive and not in the back of some strangers car

Till the next update, hugs and kisses

_

I've been staring at the blinking cursor for a while.

So many thoughts swirling around my head, yet I can't pin them down and put them into words. Or maybe I dont want to.

Things seem so much more real when they're out there in black and white for the whole world to see. And maybe if i say nothing and pretend that everything is okay, I'll have more pink days than blue and purple.

Im hiding. What am I hiding from? I dont know.

What has changed? I dont know.

Too many questions. I have no answers.

This is harder to manage than I thought. Alot of shit this week.

Blank stare again. Just breathe.

I wish I could just leave everything behind me and start again. Just pretend.
Dammit, I need to get to the happy place.

Mini Hobnobs

Crap. I just lost like half a page of ramblings.

It doesnt matter. They were last nights depressing thoughts anyway, and I refuse to rehash them and spoil another day.

Its my day off today. Kate is studying which is making me feel guilty so I need to study as well. I'll drag her out for dinner.

I keep nibbling because I'm bored. Its been so long since I've touched any formal learning material and/or used my brains (har har) that I simply cant sit still long enough to get anything done. I am such a lazy bum.

I've been eating chocolate like almost everday. (It helps me through the rough times, the sleepy times, bla bla bla). Can someone please tell me if I'm getting fat? Or am I just being paranoid?

Bah. Whatever. I need some retail therapy. Or a little bit of love.

Oh, its already August and I'm at day 26 here.

Egg Shaped

Week 3.


Im still alive, still very much in one piece, still okay.

A few minor minor accidents ( i squished my finger under a valve seat retainer. You dont need to know what it is but its a small thing and its very heavy - my finger first turned blue, then purple and now its red) but the main thing is, i am okay.

Miss home every now and then, and wake up feeling damn grumpy EVERY morning . . but i've settled :)


I am starting now to wonder whats in store for me in Kemaman. I kinda like it here, i've settled. . . the thought of having to move again is just horrible.



Anyway. Whatever.

Some other random pictures because i know everyone doesnt like to read a whole bunch of words

Camel riding!


The real Qatar. At the beach. Its really really pretty

Orange Marshmallows

Its been a rough couple of days, but i have hung on (im good at that) and am for the most part getting on fine. People are nice to me :)



I made friends, i found food . . . Now i just need to figure out how to squeeze in 6 to 7 hours of sleep in each night and still get work done.

Damn, Im pretty sure i got to sleep more in uni. Bah. Whatever. Lack of sleep makes things harder to tackle than usual, makes the days seem really long.

But as a whole, days here have passed by really quick; im in my third week of work already!
And i have blisters on my fingers, grease in my nails and am now a whole lot darker. Such is life.

Im hoping for alot of things; but mostly im just hoping that someone sees the bigger picture and that it all works out somehow.

Its late, i have work to review.

Btw, had the most amazing molten chocolate cake at Applebees today.

Beats Chillis anyday :)

Missing you all. Please go check on my dogs.

Counting Days

I have been here for 11 days. Yes, I am actually counting at the moment.

Time has passed faster than expected, Im starting to worry i wont have enough time to finish all the tasks before September.

I have whined. And I have missed home. So much. (Suddenly have become damn patriotic)

Simple act of picking up the phone and going for dinner. Having pasta. Or tomyam. Or maggi. A bottle of dry muscat. Things I cant do anymore.

Qatar is a strange city. 'New' Doha as its called is like a massive planned structure bursting out of a warzone. While im on the bus to work (it leaves at 6.50 btw, so NONE of you complain to me that you need to wake up early again) we go past piles of rock and sand and rubble. Some small little structures set in a backdrop of more sand. No green, no trees except sad looking pine trees (if you;re lucky). I pass roadworks and banged up cars; roads with no pavements or lines, plenty of potholes and orange cones.

But take a trip to the 'new' doha city, mammoth structures of glass and metal are sprouting like mushrooms (btw, do mushrooms sprout?)

The view from my window

The only nice place in Doha to eat.

Around the city centre

Im too lazy to resize and post up more pics here, will probably put them up on fb :)

I need to study.

Today

What I have learnt about Qatar in my one week stay so far:

1. The preferred mode of transport (if you have the cash) is a big white land cruiser. The bigger the better to ride sand dunes with.
2. Cars are cheap. Cheap enough that they can be abandoned by the road if they were in a crash.
3. Petrol is bloddy dirt cheap. QR0.70/l. Which works out to roughly 65 cents/liter. Which is why people can drive big cars.
4. The majority of the people living in Qatar at the moment are non natives, like me
5. Shops close in the middle of the day. Literally close.
6. Friday = Sunday = Day of rest
7. People eat alot of meat, I miss eating proper veggie
8. Movie tickets are friggin expensive. QR35/ticket. Dont EVER let me here you complain that RM10 is expensive anymore.
9. You can do wheelies in the middle of the city streets at night, traffic stops for you
10. The majority of cars here have dents in them.
11. Hungry people. They give girls the once over look everytime they pass. Damn pervy
12. I havent seen any stray cats. Maybe its too hot?
13. Temp will soar to the fifties and reach the sixties next month. Its also the time when humidity is at its maximum so you literally cant breathe.
14. There is (from my observation) a large number of prostitutes in the hotel bar/clubs
15. Hotels are the only place with a liqour license, that stuff is damn expensive

I have gotten several shades darker; I hope i haven't got any fatter.

Musings

I've reached the end of my first week. Yay!

I am very proud of myself, no tears yet. Almost tears and almost homesick, but still hanging in there.

To those of you who took the time out to email/msg me/text me/write on my wall, thank you. You have no idea how much comfort something small like that brings when you're so far away from home and there are no familiar faces.

To those who havent, shame on you! Keep me company lah!

In any case, I've managed to sort of settle. At least I'm not wandering around (that) lost anymore.

We went to a 'club' in a hotel a couple of nights ago. Its called a club, but seriously it doesnt deserve to be called one. Brings down the name of clubs everywhere else. I didnt realise that the clubbing scene in Penang/KL was that good until I came here. Haha. That place looked like a cheesier version of the old, old Soho's.

Time to get ready for work, its already 6. I cant wait for the next weekend to come, so i can sleep in!

More updates coming, toodles!

Oh, I'm excited, there are a few new people due to come in soon! Hoping that they're nice!

Mocha Mud Pie

This is what I feel like eating today.

Completely unrelated, only because I have no real pics of Qatar (my window cant open so i cant take a good night shot) and i didnt want to put up another ugly post with only words.

Its day three here . . . Because everyday is a work day I find that all the days of the week just melt into one big blur. If I didnt have to mark it off on the bus list everyday I wouldnt remember what day it is anymore.

Today was better than yesterday, hoping that tomorrow will be better than today. I finished my HUET, H2S and Sea Survivor training (Qatar has alot of sharks, yikes!) and we did the final simulation indoors, with the lights off, flashing strobe lights (lightning?), rain, wind and waves.

Wicked.

I would probably panic and freeze up if I ever had to do it in real life.

I have finally got a mobile number here! Although there is really no point in me saying that since i dont know what the number is yet . . .

The sim pack here is ridiculously expensive since there is only one service provider in the whole of Qatar. Monopoly. Bah. Like the Maxis prepaid pack 6 years ago, QD200!

Call me, talk to me, I'd love to hear another voice to say 'lah' to.

Missing all of you.

New Beginning

Im in Qatar.

Doha, Qatar to be exact.

Its hot and dusty. Like Abu Dhabi in the making. No big buildings, alot of dirt and construction. The closest shopping centre is at the city centre, a 20 minute walk away from my accomodation. Thankfully, its a nice place to stay; double bed, soft comy pillows, tv, internet, bath tub with a common kitchen and washing machine. Supposedly theres a swimming pool and gym, but I havent found it yet.

Im at Edzan Towers, you can reach me at my room at +974 4969330.

I share the place with an Indian girl, she's leaving for offshore tomorrow which leaves me all alone.

The closest place to eat is also 20 mins away at the city centre. I forsee alot of eggs, instant noodles and McDonalds delivery.

Its hard to find taxis here. And food is super expensive.

I wandered about in the sun for around 20 mins or so and I already feel crispy.

Hoping everything goes well for me. Fingers crossed.

Short Break

I'm Home!

Im back in Penang, my happy little semi turtle shaped island and im back in my room, with its multitude of pillows and soft cuddly things.

And i got a hair cut!

Its not really that much of a change, but at least some of that mess is gone.


Its a bad pic, im tired. I've been in and out of airports over the past 12 hours. And i dont sleep on flights.

I know, I am vain.

Packing Up

Its Monday, 30th June , 3.10pm and im packing up.


This morning i said goodbye to the Chai, Ann, Yun .. last night i said goodbye to the whole lot of pakistani/indians and the day before to Mitch, Ky and Chris.


Half and hour ago i said goodbye to Wes and Yasu.


In another hours time I'll say goodbye to Oscar and then at 7 i'll send off abdul and Ali.

Then its just going to be 3 of us girls left here at the Blue Towers.

I came to OFS-1 a little bit hesitant and not quite sure what to expect. Its surprising that in the space of a week I found people I could talk to, could go out with. . just the simple act of having dinner together or lunchbreaks together means alot when you're somewhere new and dont know anyone.

Im packing up and feeling just a little blue at the thought of moving on. I was getting comfortable.. Now theres so few of us left and so much free time it feels strange .. kind of lonely i guess. . But thats life. Move on, meet new people, make the best out of everything.


I had a good time here in Abu Dhabi. And its hard to imagine going to Qatar where i'll be starting out all over again. Im feeling a little envious that Mus and Wes will both be going to Labuan together.

Cross fingers, hope that i'll be okay.

When I say it fast i call it Abi Dhabi

Only a day or so left till i pack up and leave Abu Dhabi for my next location.

I dont know, although is different here i've settled into some sort of routine, made some friends..
Its going to be difficult going to a location where i know noone. At all.


Judging from the geographical coefficient, Qatar isnt all that bad . . Judging from what I've been told, if you want to go out in Kemaman, it would be better just to head to Kuantan. Damn.


Anyway, I dont do much here.. at the moment its just alot of courses (ALL DAY, OMG) so by the time we get back there isnt much time to do anything..

I wake up around 5.30 am everyday (SHIT SO EARLY) and now im just tired.. Maybe its the food, maybe its the heat... Im just so tired. Havent had much of an appetite either, i have a chicken whopper, a steak and cheese subway, a few subway cookies and chicken briyani sitting in the fridge. Just not hungry. Oh well.

By the way, stuff here is EXPENSIVE! And the meal portions are huge ! Even the McDonalds burgers are bigger (the regular is our large - i couldnt finish it) and a medium McChicken meal was 19dirhams.

Sorry if i cant call you all, 20 dirhams for 10 minutes is wayyy out of my budget

Did go out to visit the malls and do a little sightseeing . . which may be why im so tired cos im spending my rest time going out, but im only gonna be here once . . so . .


I got my coveralls. Now i look like a giant blueberry.

Dusty and Hot

Greetings for Abu Dhabi!

After flying what felt like a ridiculously long time across Malaysia and India I arrived in Abu Dhabi international Airport at around 1am local time (its 4 hours behind here). It took like forever to get through immigration and by the time i hopped onto the SLB bus (it has seatbelts!), took another neverending drive down to wherever i am and checked in to my room it was like 3am.

Thats coming to 7am for the rest of you all in Malaysia. T T

Its an intersting place (even though i haven't left my room yet), very square.

Miss all of you.
Miss the fact that i've got noone to poke fun at the blue lights in the bus or the seatbelts
And that they drive on the opposite side of the road and it feels damn weired
Or that its hot and dusty and very square
And that there arent any big trees and the skies are cloudless
And that people really do wear the red checked cloth on their heads (like in the movies!)
etc etc etc

I will be back soon!

A Thought

Five years, one week and 5 days ago, I said goodbye to Him.

He hugged me, and whispered into my ear " I'm going to miss you the most"

Seems like a lifetime ago, things have changed so much since then.

Its funny how certain things trigger your memory.

Shhhh...

Dont tell my mum, but i let the doggies into the house while everyone was away all week!
A marker of time. How did this fluffy little critter


Morph into this?

Banana Muffin

As I sit here in Coffee Bean inhaling the scent of banana muffins and black coffee and sipping my Southern Blend, I wonder if this is what i'll be doing for some time to come. Scabbing of airport wifi and passing time online while i wait for my boarding call.

Damn, thank God laptops (my pretty red Dell!) and wifi.

Seriously.

I need a haircut, I hate my current shaggy look.

Almost There

OMG OMG OMG

Its already Sunday, which means that I have less than 4 days to pack up and get ready for a whole new (hard and boring) chapter of my life.

Im leaving Friday. FRIDAY. So soon!?! Im not ready! I cant do it . .

Flight to KL on Friday to sign a few papers, then off to Dubai on Saturday, arrive on Sunday, take a van ride to Abu Dhabi, check in to my service apartment (hopfully its nice, and i dont share rooms) and crash. Then its up at 5am on Monday to get ready for my OFS-1 i.e. welcome to the oil field.

One week.

The I'm back in KL for a day or two before packing up my whole freakin life and moving to Kemaman. Terengganu. I have nothing decent to wear.

TERENGGANU. The only thing that comes to mind when I think of Terengganu is keropok lekor.

I'm worried. Not just about the place, but about the job, about everything. Its hard to leave everything behind, even more so when its for an indefinite period of time. What do I look forward to now? I know I said I'm up for the challenge, but sometimes I doubt myself. I look back on my past days and I realised I was never really alone; I always had someone to back me up. So i graduated from uni with reasonable good results, but still feeling a little like a fraud. Cos I dont know if I could have done it by myself.

I know I should be taking things with a pinch of salt, but horror stories are horror stories all the same.

I'm really going to miss my home. And my friends. And my pets. We all do what we have to, but it wasnt an easy choice to make.

My mind is in a mess

Things I need to get done, ASAP

1. Make a gazillion photocopies of everything
2. Get a new bank account
3. Buy luggage
4. PACK
5. Fix my glasses
6. Get my drivers license
7. Hunt out my transcripts from USM
8. Flight tickets
9. Clear my room
10. Get suitable (boring) clothes
11. Get my vaccinations
12. Go to a money changer
...

OH CRAP

TGIF ?

Lately, I've been going to TGIF way waaayy too frequently. I dont know what on earth possessed me to imagine that I could finish a whole entire mud pie by myself, but thats what I ordered ( In my defense, we were there for dessert, i might as well eat. Diet be dammned)

Obviously I couldnt finish it so i asked to 'tapau' the mud pie.

You should have seen the servers face. Hahahaha . . . He told me it wasnt possible.

Its a good thing the manager dude there can recognise us, this is what he packed for me:
A piece half eaten piece of mudpie wrapped in foil and surrounded by ice.

When i got home i couldnt get the mudpie out of the ice, the damn thing froze solid.

On another note, its already the 12th of June! Crap! 10 more days till I have to pack up and leave. The holidays passed too fast. . . Im not ready to start work, I'm starting to doubt myself cos when people think of (Lisa + Oil field) they find it hard to swallow. Like i cant do it.

Yes, i KNOW i act like a complete piece of fluff every now and then but still . . . we fluffy cretins have little fluffly egos too . .

What have i gotten myself into now?!

Celebrate!

I made it!

I made it through four years of uni, through my last and final semester!!

All that suffering was worth it .. I have managed to scrape through this semester and hang on by my teeth.

3.69

First Class honours! Woot!


Oh my gosh, I am so relieved.

Just so you know me

Just for you . .

I am wildly unpredictable - i have mood swings, i get depressed, i can laugh like theres no tomorrow, i can be grumpy all day and 5 minutes later have a good time with my friends
I am a softie - my heart is too big. I cry in movies, i cry over dead guinea pigs, abused animals and feel bad for roadkill/homeless people or animals/trees/
I can laugh for absolutely no reason at all, over something that isnt all that funny
I am a klutz. I trip over my own feet, walk into walls and fall into drains
I can be such a complete bimbo - who cuts my hair is a matter of great importance
I am intelligent. I am well read, i can carry a conversation, i know what im talking about
I am independent - no one needs to pick up after me or hold me hand and tell me what to do
I am a girl, which means i still adore being treated like a princess
I am shy. It takes a while for me to get to know people
Yet sometimes when i start talking i can go on forever
I am silly - i rarely look before i leap, sometimes my common sense flies out the window
I am confused. I dont know what i really want, its hard to make decisions
I love ice cream, coffee, chocolate and shopping
I can randomly spout nonsense until the cows come home
I love to abrubtly change topics when you're talking to me
I love being around people, but value my privacy
I hate sharing rooms. Get out of my personal space
Dance naked in the night!
I am a perfectionist. I love it when my margins are perfectly justified, when all my calculations are to the same decimal points, when my hand writing is perfectly straight. I like knowing that i've done a damn good job
I make my bed every night before i go to bed
I have locked my car keys in my car more than once.
I love the beach, i love the sea, i will get my diving licence some day
My dream is to own a bakery/clothes shop
But my real dream is to run a pet shelter
I like having a home. I missed out having a family
I am competitive. I've been groomed from young to compete. It doenst show
I am human. I make mistakes. Alot of them
I enjoy good wine, good liquor and good food.
I love to dance. Its unexplainable.
I get grumpy when i havent slept/eaten/left alone for too long
I am inquisitive. I ask why. Alot. Government education has squished it out of me
I am a rebel. Dont tell me what to do and expect me to do it unless it makes sense. I will go against you just because.
I still cannot speak mandarin after 4 years in a public university
I cant understand why people chuck their trash all over the place
Sometimes, I have intense cravings for an icy cold coke
I dont like chinese new year or family reunions
The less sleep i get, the less sense i make when i talk. Dont call me early in the mornings.
I dont curse, unless im driving and you piss me off
I am generally docile, unless im driving and you piss me off
I will go to back to bali and learn how to surf. properly
I am a worrywart when it comes to things important to me
I hate it when people mess up my stuff
The real world scares me. Who is going to watch me back?


I am me. This is me. No one else like me.

Just because I am

I have been waayy too lzay to upload all the Bali pics, cos STREAMYX SUCKS. Damn bloody unstable, im better off scabbing my neighbours wifi connection in the middle of the night. Anyway, because I am such a camwhore (admittance is the first step to recovery, haha) Im substituting those with pics from my Miri excursion.

Eric and I, at the Shell house. I look damn corporate, right??

The rest of us.

Because we were bored waiting, we took a trip out the back door to see the Piasau beach, just off the shell residence. Like a 3 minute walk away.

Piasau beach. I cant remember what was so funny . .

Apparently, a trip to Miri isnt complete without visiting the Grand Old Lady on Canada Hill.

The first ever oil rig, been here since 1910. And I am too lazy to add more pics of kolo mee and 3 coloured tea, so toodles!